small time crooks


Ray (Woody Allen) is an incompetent crook with big dreams and a low IQ. When he sets up his wife, Frenchy (Tracey Ullman), in a storefront to cover his tunneling operation into a local bank, her baked goods take off, and Ray and Co. are catapulted from rags to riches. A brilliant ensemble cast including Hugh Grant, Elaine May and Jon Lovitz has got Allen's back.

A wacky plot with wacky but still incredibly strong and intelligent comedy. Sometimes, or maybe most times, very uncomfortable to watch. Still very entertaining. Small Time Crook both the most silly, and awkward of the woody allen movies i have seen.

7/10


samurai champloo (disc 1-4)


Director Shinichiro Watanabe mixes a maturity rarely found in anime with a historical Japanese setting and a funky hip-hop soundtrack. Fuu is a spacey waitress at a teahouse where a sword fight breaks out between Mugen, a wild warrior, and Jin, a more composed ronin. In exchange for saving them from execution, Fuu demands that they accompany her on a journey to find "a samurai who smells of sunflowers."

I am not a huge anime guy, but this one has some how managed to keep my interest. Where most anime that i have seen has too much weirdness, Champloo manages to stay with it's fairly straight forward story of 3 people on a journey to find the sunflower samurai. As in most television shows there are a few side tracks here and there but even those kept me entertained. Animated by the same people who did Cowboy Beebop so it's pretty amazing to look at. My only real issue with this show is that they try to make samurai, something i'm very interested in, and make it sometimes annoyingly hip, but i guess that's sort of a good thing too.

7/10

dexter season 1 (4 disc)


Michael C. Hall pulls it off neatly in this Showtime drama about a likable forensics expert who channels his violent tendencies by killing miscreants who've avoided punishment. So harmless is Dexter Morgan's (Hall) demeanor that neither his girlfriend (Julie Benz) nor his sister (Jennifer Carpenter) has any inkling of his extracurricular activities.

A nice fresh twist on the crime drama, with so far excellent story writing (based on a novel that i should probably read) and no noticeable filler episodes that i hate so much. Despite most descriptions i don't really think this is much of a stretch for Michael C. Hall from six feet under, he is still sexually pent up and weird, but now he kills people instead of just whining about it all the time.

8/10
diving bell and the butterfly


In 1995, author and Elle magazine editor Jean-Dominique Bauby suffered a stroke that put him in a coma; he awakened mute and completely paralyzed. Mathieu Amalric stars in this adaptation of Bauby's autobiography, which he dictated by blinking. Julian Schnabel was nominated for the 2008 Best Director Oscar and won the Golden Globe in the same category for his poignant film about the strength of the human spirit.

a very touching story, but i don't think i like how it was pulled off. I think i just didn't like use of so many first person shots. Other than that, very well acted and a story to pull your heart strings.

6/10

this american life (season 2) (3 hours so two disc?)

Documenting unique and compelling stories about everyday people through field recordings, essays, memoirs and found footage, host Ira Glass brings his Peabody Award-winning Chicago Public Radio show back to the small screen for a second season. Highlights include profiles of an obsessed birdwatcher, a 27-year-old quadriplegic man and his caregiver mother, and two convicts who nearly escaped from a Wisconsin prison using dental floss.

Almost as amazing as the radio show. Great slices of life that make you consider your own. The final episode of this season was amazing. Filmed with 6 (i think) people named "John Smith" of pretty different age groups. From a baby to a Senile old man. The writers have some incredible knack for making the completely mundane completely extraordinary. Not quite as great as season 1 but still highly Recommended. (also has some awesome chris ware animation)

9/10

165/300

blades of glory
When a scandal strips them of their gold medals, two world-class skaters (Will Ferrell and Jon Heder) skirt their way back onto the ice via a loophole that allows them to compete together as a pairs team. Will Arnett ("Arrested Development") and Amy Poehler ("Saturday Night Live") co-star as their competitive on-ice rivals who vow to use their triple axel to the fullest advantage.

will ferrell, new sport same jokes. Couple funny lines

4/10
miller's crossing
Gabriel Byrne stars as Tom Reagan in Joel and Ethan Coen's take on the '30s gangster film. Adviser to a Prohibition-era crime boss (Albert Finney), Tom gets caught in the literal and figurative crossfire when his loyalties are divided between warring mobs. Mix in an affair with the boss's dame (Marcia Gay Harden), several double-crosses and backstabs and the Coens' typical blackly funny dialogue, and you've got a bang-up (literally) movie.

my favorite mob movie, and each time i watch it i think i like it more and more, slowly becoming my favorite coen bros movie. Lots of little stuff to pick up that warrants multiple watches.

10/10

beast with a million backs
The crew at Planet Express must work overtime to seal a portal between their universe and an alternate universe ruled by the gargantuan alien Yivo (David Cross), whose Earth-conquering plans include making Fry the pope of the alternate realm. Bender, Leela, Amy, Farnsworth and the gang are back in this tentacle-packed feature spinoff of the hit animated series. Other guest voices include Brittany Murphy and Stephen Hawking.

maybe more than a half hour is more that futurama can stay entertaining. has a couple great moments, mostly with zoidberg and david cross.

6/10
hancock

Will Smith stars as Hancock, a down-and-out superhero forced to employ a PR expert, Ray Embrey (Jason Bateman), to help repair his image when the public grows weary of all the damage he has inflicted during his life-saving heroics. Ray's idea of imprisoning the antihero to make the world miss him proves successful, but will Hancock stick to his new sense of purpose or slip back into old habits? Charlize Theron co-stars in Peter Berg's action comedy.

I don't get why every one was so pissed at this movie, i thought it was a pretty decent will smith/super hero movie. I sort of like the twist, plus, Will Smith gets drunk, that's pretty awesome.

7/10

my winnepeg
Guy Maddin's dreamlike biographical documentary is part psychoanalysis and part historical study of Winnipeg, Canada, Maddin's hometown. Poetry serves as narration to explain how the city's idiosyncratic culture has influenced the director. From lyrical ramblings about how the denizens of Winnipeg exist in perpetual "sleep mode" to fanciful reenactments of scenes from Maddin's dysfunctional childhood, the film comprises a unique allegory of life.

i do not know how seriously to take this guy. He is too artsy for his own good. Neat to look at, and a couple really amazing lines and the idea of him casting his whole family with actors and his mom playing her self is pretty funny. When he is actually telling a story and not just rambling it is very entertaining but those parts are few and far between. Maybe i just don't get it?

6/10

death to smoochy

Danny DeVito directs this dark comedy set in the dog-eat-dog world of children's television. Kids' show star Rainbow Randolph (Robin Williams) gets fired over a bribery scandal and is replaced by Smoochy (Edward Norton) -- a puffy, purple rhinoceros. When Randolph discovers Smoochy is having an affair with Randolph's ex-lover Nora (Catherine Keener), a top programming executive at the network, he plots his revenge.

i have a crush on catherine keener. going on a safari.

8/10

lost boys: the tribe

After their parents die in a car accident, Chris Emerson (Tad Hilgenbrink) and his sister, Nicole (Autumn Reeser), move in with their quirky Aunt Jillian in her California beach town. Soon Nicole falls for a local surfer, who, unbeknownst to her, is also a vampire. Now Chris finds himself battling the whole gang of vampire surfers in an effort to rescue his sister. Corey Feldman and Corey Haim co-star in this sequel to 1987's Lost Boys.

pretty awful. Corey Feldman says some funny shit and there is some funny gore. other wise pretty much as good as that buffy episode with the ventriloquist dummy.

4/10

153/300

Lost Boys: The Tribe

In the much anticipated sequel to 1987's vampire movie, "The Lost Boys", we find a similar storyline,  similar terrible-ness in a good way-ness, and similar Corey Feldman.  Replacing Corey Haim and Jason Patric's characters are two people I've never heard of playing a pro surfer who got kicked off the circuit and his little sister.  After the surfer "snaps" and gets kicked off the circuit, he takes his sister to Santa Clara, which  looks suspiciously Canadian.  Then we pretty much go down the same road as we did back in '87.

Not quite as good as the original.  Corey Feldman pretty much makes it worthwhile.  Every one of his lines is  pure gold.  "Who ordered the stake?"  He asks, brandishing two stakes made of wooden crosses.   Not as classic as "Death by stereo" but still hilarious.  Other then Feldman it's kind of hit or miss.  But the return of Edgar Frog totally makes "The Tribe" worth checking out.

8/10

71/150

More drugs, more violence...

More reviews.  Down below starting with Harold and Kumar.

unforgiven

Long-retired gunslinger William Munny (Clint Eastwood) reluctantly takes one last job -- and even more reluctantly accepts a boastful youth (Jaimz Woolvett) as a partner. Together, they discover how easily complicated truths are distorted into simplistic myths about the Old West. Gene Hackman (who won an Oscar) and Richard Harris stand out as old foes who have an unhappy reunion. Other Oscars include Best Picture and Director (Eastwood).

clint eastwood starts off quite the wuss and then goes to battle with the biggest badass gene hackman thus turning clint into the ultimate badass. Oh yeah morgan freeman is there to teach wise ol' ways. pretty solid, pretty standard western

7/10

man bites dog

A satirical look at how the media affects and promotes violence in modern society. Spoofing reality television, a fascinated documentary crew follows a charismatic yet unrepentant serial killer on his murder sprees. The crew attempts to objectively document the horror, but as the violence escalates, they ultimately get sucked into participating. Man Bites Dog won the International Critics' Prize at the 1992 Cannes Film Festival.

pretend that ricky gervais worked as a serial killer rather than a paper co. boss. Amazingly funny but not for the faint of heart. Beautifully shot and and acted as most criterion stuff.

10/10

naked lunch

Director David Cronenberg brings William S. Burroughs' hallucinatory, "unfilmable" novel to the screen. Part-time exterminator and full-time drug addict Bill Lee (Peter Weller) plunges into the nightmarish netherworld of the Interzone, pursuing a mysterious project that leads him to confront sinister cabals and giant talking bugs. Special features include an audio commentary by Cronenberg and Weller

my least favorite cronenberg movie to date, but still pretty awesome gore and talking buttholes and weird humping scorpion centipedes. Probably for fans of heroin and fear and loathing in las vegas.

6/10

amarcord

Awarded both a Golden Globe and an Oscar for Best Foreign Film, acclaimed Italian director Frederico Fellini's Amarcord is a richly visual film about Rimini, a traditional seaside village during the uncertainty of Mussolini's fascist rule. Fellini drew from personal experience to bring the small town and all its colorful characters to life in this story about the escapades of a boy on the cusp of becoming a man.

an early form of slapstick that probably highly influenced mel brooks. This movie really wasn't for me, but i don't really enjoy zany humor especially from a foreign country so i don't even get it's social commentary

6/10
vicky christina barcelona

Academy Award winner Javier Bardem (No Country for Old Men) stars in the latest effort from legendary filmmaker Woody Allen as a flamboyant painter who finds himself in the middle of a unique relationship with Vicky (Rebecca Hall) and Christina (Scarlett Johansson), a pair of American tourists. Penélope Cruz (Volver) also stars as Bardem's insanely jealous ex-wife, Maria Elena, in this quirky romantic dramedy set in Barcelona.

Woody Allen back to his more traditional movie making. His movies seem very relateable, it's got a neurotic personality for every one. Scarlett is the sort of deviant side, while rebecca hall is the much more conservative side and javier bardem is just a real ladies man. Funny and pretty adorable, watch with a date.

8/10

146/300

Drugs and Violence

Pineapple Express dir. David Gordon Green

Tropic Thunder dir. Ben Stiller

I enjoyed both of these movies, with both of them being pretty much exactly what I expected.  "Pineapple Express" is a Judd Apatow movie, but with a lot more action, and "Tropic Thunder" is a Ben Stiller movie combined with a big budget Vietnam movie.  So you pretty much know what you are getting into.

Pineapple Express is hilarious, mostly because of the two leads, Seth Rogen and James Franco formerly of  Apatow's "Freaks and Geeks".  There are just so many good lines.  Also funny is Danny McBride of "Foot Fist Way" who is also in Tropic Thunder.  McBride spends much of Tropic Thunder with Nick Nolte, who is playing the vet who wrote the book that the movie is based on.

I would have to say I enjoyed Pineapple Express slightly more then Tropic Thunder, even though it had a pretty terrible ending.  Some people have complained about the whole last section of the movie, when the film switches to full action mode,  but I was alright with it.

Pineapple:  9/10

Thunder:  8/10

That's all for now.  More later:

Movies:

Shotgun Stories

Harold and Kumar 2

True Romance

Doomsday

70/150

Books:

The Man Who Was Tuesday

The Son Also Rises

15/15

the graduate
doomsday
great ecstasy of the sculptor walter steiner
how much wood would a wood chuck chuck
encounters at the end of the world
bed and board
stolen kisses

141

Harold and Kumar Escape From Guantanamo  Bay

Harold and Kumar are on the way to Amsterdam but get mistaken for terrorists and are sent to Guantanomo Bay where (spoiler alert!) they escape and go on the run to find a guy who can help them (thank goodness they saw him at the airport!) and stop a wedding (thank goodness they saw her at the airport!).

I didn't have high (get it!) expectations when I saw the first one but I loved it.  I thought it was hilarious even though I wasn't stoned when I saw it.  The sequel just can't compare.   It's the same deal with one crazy scenario after another, but each one seems to be just a weaker version of what we already saw in the first one.  Neal Patrick Harris is back.  The giant bag of weed is back.  Even Christopher Meloni returns.   But none of these things are as funny as the original.

It's weird that a movie about two guys going to get burgers had a better story then a movie about two guys escaping from prison and being pursued by the law.  But that is the case.  If you liked the first one, you will be disappointed.  If you didn't like the first one, you will hate the sequel.

5.5/10

Doomsday  dir. Neil Marshall

I saw this week and here is what I remember about the plot:  it didn't really matter.  The real point of this movie was to have a hot chick (Rhona Mitra) battle cannibals with mohawks,  a giant covered in armor in a gladiator type arena, and a chase sequence where she ramps her car through a graffiti covered bus and a guy's head flies into the camera.  Basically lots of cool stuff happens and there is some story about getting a cure for all these people  or.... I don't know.   It's stupid, but a bunch of badass stuff happens and Rhona Mitra is super hot.  Good movie to have on at a party or something because I'm sure it's just as good if you can't hear anything, or if you miss chunks of the story.

7.5/10

True Romance dir. Tony Scott

Huge cast (Balki from "Perfect Strangers" has a bigger role than Brad Pitt,  Samuel L. Jackson, and Tony Soprano) but Christian Slater and Patricia Arquette are the stars of this violent love story written by Quentin Tarantino.   Clarence (Slater) and Alabama (Arquette) steal a briefcase full of cocaine and try to unload it all at once before the gangsters they stole it from can catch them.  Also features:

-- Brad Pitt smoking pot out of bear shaped honey bottle.

-- Val Kilmer as Elvis

-- Balki also has more screen time than Christopher Walken, Dennis Hopper, and a dreadlocked Gary Oldman.

Pretty Awesome.  Tarantino's most hollywood-ish script is well taken care of by director Tony Scott (who hollywood-ed up the ending.)

9/10

Across The Universe dir. Julie Taymor

I couldn't watch this whole movie.  A bunch of people sing Beatles songs, quote Beatles lyrics, and are  named after Beatles characters.  I like the Beatles, but I don't like watching actors sing their songs.  It seems like people liked this movie, but it was too much for me.

4/10 on the off chance it got better.

Shotgun Stories dir.  Jeff Nichols

Pretty standard indie drama.  Three brothers (Son, Kid, and Boy) live together (Kid and Boy move in from their tent and van, respectively) when their mom comes to tell them their dad died.  They "crash" the funeral, attended by the family their dad started after leaving his sons and  finding God.  They manage to piss off their half-brothers, and things eventually get ugly.

This movie would've been really good if it ended better.  Two main characters die suddenly and one of them off camera.  The film kind of stumbles towards an anti-climactic ending after that.

7/10

The Man Who Was Thursday (book) G. K. Chesterton

I saw in a magazine that said this was one of the funniest books ever.  It's not.  It was first published in 1908.  It was probably the funniest book ever in 1908.

Anyway a guy working for the police infiltrates an Anarchist group of seven who all have days of the week for names.  He finds out he is not the only undercover cop in the group, and things start getting predictable until the end which I had high hopes for, but was disappointed.  There's supposedly some sort of Christian allegory but I didn't really get it.

6/10

The Sun Also Rises  Ernest Hemingway

After the war, friends get drunk and go to parties and bullfights.  Pretty great.

9/10